


One Year Later

by FairyLights101



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Injury, M/M, Major Character Injury, Mike is alive he never died what are you talking about, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-26
Updated: 2016-02-26
Packaged: 2018-05-23 06:58:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6108706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FairyLights101/pseuds/FairyLights101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Why the fuck are you out here, Mike?” </p><p>“Can’t old comrades see each other?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Year Later

“Levi?” 

The man glanced up, eyes narrowed against the sun until a figured covered it up, tall and broad. Mike stared at him, wide-eyed and grinning as he peered shamelessly at Levi, hair even longer than it had been the last time he’d seen Mike.  _ Then again, it’s been fucking ages _ . As if to remind him, his leg throbbed and he scowled. “What?” Levi grumbled as he rocked back onto his heels as he dragged the back of his arm across his sweaty face - disgustingly, embarrassingly sweaty. And dirty to boot. 

Mike’s smile only broadened at his voice and he gestured around them to the trees behind his tiny home and the other houses further away, blissfully uncrowded. “I didn’t expect to see you in a place like this. I thought they were pulling my leg when they told me you were in the outer colonies, especially these.” 

Levi’s scowl deepened, but the harsh look didn’t last. He was tired of anger - he just wanted peace. Which is exactly why he’d gone to the mountain settlements in the west and not the eastern ones where the sea lay. “Why the fuck are you out here, Mike?” 

“Can’t old comrades see each other?” 

“No one but Erwin and Hanji have visited - everyone else hates me, or they’re dead. So why now? It’s been a year.” 

Mike leaned against Levi’s fence, face soft in the harsh summer sunlight as he pinned Levi down with his deep brown eyes, commanding yet not all at the same time. “Nobody hates you. They just want to give you time. I wanted to come sooner, but Erwin said you didn’t want visitors.” 

Levi winced at the reminder, at the memory of shattered plates and bitter words - of chasing two of his only friends out because he couldn’t bear to be around them. Not with the screams of soldiers in his ears and the knowledge that he was - and always would be - little more than a killer. Even if those people hadn’t been human anymore. “I still don’t want company,” he muttered as he glanced down at the plants he’d been knee-deep in, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off Mike. 

The blond shook his head, smile so soft it made Levi’s chest ache. “You reek of loneliness. And you can’t lie to me, Tiny.” Levi huffed and tore his eyes from Mike’s - his cheeks were flushed from the heat and sun, had to be - and focused on the plants before him. But he could still see Mike’s feet clad in boots, but not in the military style. Loose brown pants instead of tight white ones. Civilian clothes - and he was in them too. Perfectly normal when he was alone, strange when he had reminders of what life had once been like.  _ I shouldn’t miss it this much _ . “Want some help?” 

“Go away, Mike.” 

_ Just leave me alone, all of you _ . 

“I brought tea. The good stuff from Sina - your favorite.” 

He didn’t want to get up, didn’t want to look at Mike anymore and be reminded of everything he missed. Especially not Mike. But he rose slowly and limped over to the gate, unlatched it, and let Mike in. He nearly slammed the gate into the blond when he spotted Mike’s smug grin, but he held off and banged it shut a little harder than necessary behind Mike. 

He limped back over to the patch of earth he’d been weeding, snatched his cane up, and marched off to his house as quick as he could. Mike kept pace easily, silent and careful as always. The floors were quiet beneath their feet and polished to a shine despite everything, especially how fucking hard it was to get down to the floor. And being a veteran had its benefits - he didn’t have to go outside and pump water, and bless the brilliant ass who had gifted him with indoor plumbing. He filled a kettle up and set it on the wood stove, the fire inside still smoldering. He threw enough in to keep it going, prodded it, and sank down into a kitchen chair across from Mike. 

The blond stared at him as Levi tried to glare holes into the table, thankfully impossible because he liked it. The quiet crack of the fire and the hiss of the kettle filled the silence, made it a little less uncomfortable with how much hung between them until he pulled the kettle off and poured them both a cup. Levi propped his leg up with a wince as the tea steeped and he rubbed at his knee and calf, the deep scar tissue that wrapped around his leg all too tangible beneath his touch. And he could feel Mike’s gaze on him, so heavy that he almost couldn’t breathe. “How’s your leg doing?” 

“Shitty.”  _ What a stupid question _ . But, for some reason he couldn’t place, the question made his chest warm. He dismissed it - had to have been the tea. Everything for them was long gone. had been since he’d left. 

“You know,” Mike murmured, “I really thought you’d lose it. It was a bad accident.” 

“So I hear.” 

He didn’t remember it, just a blur of silver and a glimpse of the ground as it rushed up at him. Equipment malfunction from another scout mid-battle. The wires had wrapped around his leg and the weight of his comrade and his momentum had made it bite in - and the wires weren’t the kind that snapped. It had been even worse when the Titan had grabbed and yanked the other guy until Levi’s anchors had come out of the tree as the man’s screams had cut off. His head had hit a branch, his leg snapped on another, and Mike had shot an anchor into his foot, stopped his unconscious body. 

The wires had sliced through his leg, severed tendons and nerves. The anchor had punched through his foot and opened up on the other side, and they’d had to cut the wire to get it out. Even if everything else had healed up, he’d never walk right again. And it had let him bitter. Broken.  _ Stop reminding me, dammit _ . 

“Do you wish you’d died?” 

Levi’s eyes snapped up from his cup, and Mike’s stare pinned him down, froze him in place. Levi swallowed hard and shook his head, slow and hesitant. “Not anymore. Not unless it really hurts.” 

“That’s good.” 

“Yeah… And thanks.” 

Mike’s only answer to that was a warm but melancholy smile as they sipped at their tea and Levi kneaded the knots and aches from his leg. It stayed quiet until Mike poured himself a second cup and shifted, something blatantly on his mind. He managed to speak when he was halfway through his cup, eyes down. “Levi… I’m moving out here. Staying where the walls were… I don’t like it. Could you let me stay? I’ve already got a job, thanks to Erwin, but I need a place to stay.” 

Levi sighed and leaned back in his chair as he peered at Mike over the lip of his cup and the curve of his hand. “Why? You’ve got the military pension. Go get a cottage and raise horses. Get a pretty little wife, or maybe a husband.” 

“I might as well work while I can. I’m not ready to settle down.” 

Levi sighed and let his head drop back for a moment before he nodded. “There’s an extra bedroom. I’ll made the bed and clean it while you get your shit.” 

Mike beamed at him and nodded - and Levi’s knees would have buckled at that had he not been firmly seated. “I’ll get my bags.” 

Levi just waved him on and, when the door shut with a soft click, he sagged into the chair. His leg ached something fierce. The weeding still wasn’t done. He had to dust and cook. He had to clean up the extra bedroom.  _ I just want to sleep _ . Levi sighed and rose slowly. His leg twinged as he limped to the room and dug out all his cleaning supplies on the way. He made the bed, dusted, and was in the middle of sweeping when the back door opened. “Levi?” 

“Back here.” 

Soft footsteps - they’d always been surprisingly soft for a man of Mike’s size - filled the house and stilled just outside the door. Levi refused to look up, just kept his eyes down as he shuffled to another part of the room. “Levi, do you want-” 

“Fuck off,” he spat. 

But, instead of listening, Mike reached out and tugged the broom from his grasp. “Let me. Go sit down, rest your leg. I know it hurts.” Levi wanted to snarl something back, but something about Mike’s face drained the energy straight out of him, so he slipped past Mike and limped to his room, cane heavy on the floor. He was tired, so fucking tired, and it was all too easy to crawl onto his bed and curl up the best he could in the dark room, all too thankful for the heavy curtains he’d gotten to block out the light. 

_ What the fuck am I doing? _

That thought carried him into a restless sleep, one that only lasted for a handful of hours, and he woke with the setting sun that eeked through a curtain Mike must have twitched open and a warm hand on his shoulder that he jerked away from. The touch made something in him shrivel, yet he wanted to lunge and grab Mike’s hand, bring it closer. But he couldn’t. He’d closed too many doors, burned too many bridges, to be able to reach out and take that hand again. “Dinner’s ready,” Mike murmured. 

Levi sat up , rubbed his eyes, and nodded, but Mike didn’t budge, not until Levi slid out of bed, unsteady for a moment. He glanced down, just to make sure his toes were still there - ten still stared back, five of them numb. Levi shuffled after Mike and glared at his back as if that could answer all his questions, or something along the lines of that anyway. They ate in silence, not comfortable, but not terribly awkward either. Just harder.  _ And why shouldn’t it be? Here’s the man who fucked you into the sheets more times than you can count. The man you loved. Whole and healthy while you’re broken and fucked up. He’s always been too good _ . 

He knew Mike watched him as he ate. Knew that he frowned when Mike saw how little Levi ate, but Levi resolutely refused to look up. Because those brown eyes would break him in a different way.  _ Why’d I let him stay? Because I’m depressed and lonely? Fuck that _ . “Thanks,” he mumbled as he grabbed his plate, what little he’d gotten barely disturbed. He didn’t want to look at it again,  _ never _ did, but he covered it anyway and thrust it in the icebox. 

“Levi-” 

“I’m going to my room. Do what you want.” 

The thump of a cane and a heavy foot chased after him, filled his ears as he scowled into the gloom of his home. he didn’t bother to light a candle - he just painstakingly stripped down to his underwear and sank down beneath the window, his lame leg stretched out. There was a starburst scar on the top of his foot where the anchor had come through. And, sometimes, Levi could remember lurching up, screaming, as hands pinned him down and fire tore through his leg as they sliced the wire and tried to repair his leg before everything went numb, then black. But Mike had been there, panicked, his eyes wide, face pale and streaked with blood.  _ His _ blood. Levi scowled and let his head fall back and hit the wall with a thunk, careless. 

_ Formations. Maneuvers. Think of those _ . Those only made him feel worse - a street rat who’d been given wings, only for those to be ripped off. And the higher powers had given him another bullshit hand and left him alive, much to his frustration.  _ All that time with Titans and one couldn’t fucking get me. Mike wouldn’t let me hit the Goddamn ground _ . 

As if to taunt him, his leg and foot throbbed, and Levi bit back a whimper of pain as he let his head fall to his other knee. “It doesn’t hurt,” he breathed, “It doesn’t hurt.” Compared to the ache in his chest where exhilaration had once been firmly seated before it had been ripped away, it was barely even a twinge. 

He fell asleep beneath the window, spine pressed to the wall and hands clasped around his ankle as he sank into a doze even insomnia couldn’t keep him from. But the way he hit the floor did, gasping and thrashing and screaming as white-hot wires bit into his leg, sent blood spilling down his body. Hands clasped his shoulders, shook him as he desperately tried to tear them off. “Levi, Levi, they’re gone! The wires, they’re gone!” 

His eyes snapped open and he grabbed a wrist, clung to it as the shaking slowed. “Here,” he gasped, “They’re here. Hurts, Mike,  _ hurts _ .” 

“I know, I know. I’m sorry Levi, so sorry.” Levi just shook his head and whimpered as his leg spasmed, smashed against the ground. And he barely felt it. Normally he didn’t break, didn’t cry, especially not when someone else was present, but Mike’s warm hands and body and his soft voice left Levi weak, and tears burned down his cheeks as he clung to Mike with all he had. 

The tears took minutes to stop, the same with the painful tingle in his leg, and Levi pressed into Mike. He couldn’t face Mike, couldn’t look at him after that failure to stay composed. And Mike didn’t say anything, just smoothed his hair back and stroked Levi’s arm. Distantly, he realized that Mike had started to hum, a slow and quiet tune that soothed the rest of Levi’s tremors and lulled him into something like calm until his breathing slowed and fell back into a normal pattern. 

Levi nosed his way into Mike’s neck and breathed deep. He smelled like he had before, back in the Corps - like the sun and wind and earth, sweet and musty. And it still left Levi dizzy, reling as he clung tighter. “I never told you I loved you,” he whispered, and Mike’s fingers twitched on his skin. “You didn’t have to. I knew.” 

“But I  _ left _ . I never said anything to you.” 

“Levi, I  _ crippled _ you. You have every-” 

“Shut the fuck up, idiot. You didn’t-” 

_ “I shot the anchor _ . Not Erwin. Not Hanji. Me. I did that.” 

“Not your fault. Accidents happen.” 

“But you couldn’t be there at the last battle. You can’t use the gear. You can barely  _ walk _ .” 

“At least I’m alive.”  _ Because that means this happens _ . 

Mike’s mouth opened, but Levi crushed their mouths together, silenced him as he kissed Mike hard for the first time in well over a year. And it left his head spinning as he gripped Mike’s collar, tugged him close and scrunched his eyes shut tight. The lack of movement terrified him, and then huge hands pressed against his back, pressed him close as Mike tipped his head to the side and opened up beneath Levi’s lips. A rush of warmth filled his gut, made him tremble as he kissed Mike, starved for his touch, his taste. Something he hadn’t even realized he’d been desperate until he’d gotten it again. Mike’s arms helped him up, pressed him close, and the blond took two steps over to the bed where he eased Levi down. 

The small man didn’t want the kiss to end, and he couldn’t bite back a tiny whine when it did, but Mike chuckled and kissed his cheeks, then his neck as he pressed his fingers onto Levi’s shoulders and trailed his fingers down as he sank as well. Mike pressed his lips to Levi’s chest, left a winding path of soft, warm kisses that made Levi shiver and lean into it, even when Mike worshipped his scars, his imperfections. 

Mike skimmed over the band of his boxers before he worked those off, left him bare in the dark. A kiss to each hollow of his hip, and then Mike peppered his legs with more butterfly touches of his lips. Down his good leg first, so soft it tickled, and Levi smiled as Mike peeked up at him, his mouth pressed against Levi’s ankle. The smile faded when he moved to the other leg and left kisses that Levi could barely feel, could only see as Mike stroked the harsh lines on his leg, then the starburst scar on both sides of his foot. 

“I've always loved you,” he breathed against Levi’s ankle as he thumbed the scars, and it made levi’s heart wrench as Mike smiled at him, still as fond and as soft as it had been when he’d still been in the Corps, familiar from long nights spent in each other’s arms by candlelight and any secluded moment they’d managed to snatch. “That’s why I came here. Not for a job. For you. I wanted… I hoped you’d take me back.” 

“Of course.” Even he couldn't quite tell what he meant by that - if it was because that was something Mike had been bound to do, or if it was because he'd longed so much for that stupid, brilliant man. 

Another kiss to his ankle, unfelt, and Mike smiled as he rose and stripped as well. He folded their clothes and set them on the desk before he nestled in on the other side of the bed, wordless. Strong arms tugged Levi down and into a broad, solid chest, and the smaller man sighed, content. Mike’s arms were just as he’d remembered, and it made it easier to forget the ache in his leg and the way his heart still thumped at an uncomfortably swift pace, all the more obvious when Mike’s hand settled over his heart. “You’re so warm,” Mike murmured into his hair, and Levi snorted, even as he pressed back against him. 

“That’s rich, coming from you.” 

Mike’s fingers stroked the skin over his heart and he hummed as he nosed Levi’s hair. “I missed you. A lot. I thought about you so much… I think Erwin thought I’d die of heartbreak or something. I… Fuck, it’s embarrassing, but I slept in your bed every night.” 

Levi almost couldn’t breathe as he nodded and squeezed Mike’s hand, not sure if he’d ever be able to let go after all that. “I missed you too,” he whispered into the dark, so soft that he could barely hear himself. But Mike must have because his lips twitched up against Levi’s neck. “Mike?” 

“Yeah?” 

“What you did… It’s okay. I never hated you for it.” 

The fingers on his chest spasmed and Mike sniffed quietly as he pressed their bodies tighter together. “I’m glad. You were so cold after that I thought - well, you know.” 

“Yeah.”  _ And I’m not proud of that _ . He reached out for Mike’s other hand and slid their fingers together as he closed his eyes. He wouldn’t sleep,  _ couldn’t _ sleep, but it was okay. Because Mike was finally there, and it pulled a weak smile onto his lips as he pressed his cool feet against Mike’s calves and closed his eyes. “I know.”  _ And I know that I love you. _

**Author's Note:**

> This originally was going to be the fill for a request and then I realized it was a little too (read: a lot) angsty, so here you are!  
> Also, I have come to the conclusion that I'm horrific at titles, but fuck it because yes.  
> Thanks for reading and have a wonderful day/night/existence!


End file.
